September 22, 2005

What I Learned from Hurricane Katrina

After watching television, reading numerous news articles and reading hundreds of left-wing blogs on Hurricane Katrina for the past couple of weeks, I feel that I have learned the following:
  1. George W. Bush is the reason for Hurricane Katrina's devastation. Well, of course, he cannot control the weather, but his environmental policies must have contributed somehow. Yeah, that's right - Hurricane Katrina would not have happened if President Bush had just signed the Kyoto Treaty. Oh wait, Bill Clinton didn't either? Even though he spent more on the New Orleans levees than his predecessor did, it must be President Bush's fault that it was not enough or that the state government diverted resources. Never mind that any such projects would still not have been completed in time to stop the devastation.
  2. The federal government has miserably failed the people if it cannot mobilize a few hundred thousand troops within a few hours of the flooding.
  3. A President must never send troops to fight in a foreign war. After all, there is always a chance that a hurricane could strike and we would need the troops.
  4. From the news coverage, I can only assume that hurricanes must only destroy property owned by African-Americans. I guess that is either because the Hurricane magically avoid the property of white residents of New Orleans or the white residents must have built their property in secret hurricane-free zones .
  5. From the news coverage, I can tell that no white people must have been killed by Hurricane Katrina. I guess that hurricanes and floods only kill African-Americans.
  6. Based upon all of the talk of a "racial divide" and institutional racism by African-American leaders, I have learned that white Americans do not care about the plight of African-Americans in the affected areas. All of the millions donated for hurricane relief efforts must have come from only African-American contributors. The billions of dollars to be spent by local, state and federal taxpayers on the relief efforts and reconstruction of damaged property must come from only African-American taxpayers.
  7. If you get all of your news from the mainstream media, it would be very easy to deduce that only New Orleans suffered damage from Hurricane Katrina. Based on the wonderful news coverage of New Orleans, it would not be hard to conclude that other surrounding cities and Mississippi must not have been damaged too extensively.
  8. If you build your city under sea level, there is a good chance that your entire city can be wiped out by a hurricane. Rather than spending local and state tax revenues on the repair of infrastructure that will prevent your city from flooding, wait for federal funds to do so. Moreover, rather than spend the money, which is given to Louisiana by the federal government to fix the levees that prevent such flooding, it is the state representatives' job to divert that money to other pet projects. When a hurricane hits and your city floods because a levee broke, it is essential that you blame the federal government for not giving you enough money to fix the levees and fund your other pet projects.
  9. The looting of televisions and stereos is justifiable. After all, aren't they necessities? Oh, they are not? Well, it must be justifiable because the looters have been ravaged by capitalism. It is only fair, right?
  10. Do not thank the rescue workers, who are risking their lives to save hurricane victims. Rather, complain that they did not get there fast enough and accuse them of being racists.
  11. Do not thank the government for providing you with food, temporary shelter and spending money. Rather, complain that your free debit card is not working.
  12. If your mayor and governor fail to use available resources (e.g., hundreds of buses and other forms of public transportation) to evacuate your city prior to a hurricane, blame George Bush for failing to come down to New Orleans and personally drive evacuees out of New Orleans.
  13. If Democratic politicians, who are actually responsible for failing to evacuate New Orleans and following pre-existing hurricane preparation plans, fail miserably, then you must divert all attention from such politicians and place all blame to George Bush.
  14. All poverty is George Bush's fault. Period.
  15. If restoring law and order is a problem following a hurricane, send your entire police force to Las Vegas.
  16. Conducting investigations into the government failures behind Hurricane Katrina's relief efforts is a good idea - unless the scope of the investigation goes beyond the federal government and includes state and local governments.
  17. Rather than donate to the Red Cross or the Salvation Army, it is your duty to instead send political contributions to MoveOn.Org and John Kerry so that they can campaign against the sinister George W. Bush.


I will have more, but my work day has begun... damn inconvenient.
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